Once upon a time, not too long ago, there existed an apartment complex. In it, there were
many tenants. They ranged from once-beloved icons such as Little Red Riding Hood and Tinker Bell, to less popular ones like the Ugly Duckling and Glinda. However, their status didn’t matter to the Big Bad Wolf, who charged them all at least $1200 a month for rent. If the living conditions of these rooms were decent, the price would make sense, but unfortunately that was not the case. These rooms were full of problems, including broken pipes, inconsistent heating, air conditioning and an overall aesthetically unpleasing environment. It was glaringly obvious that this was not a nice place to live at.
Out of all the tenants who seemed to oppose their landlord, three stuck out in particular. They were three little pigs, who vehemently despised their oppressive landlord, and they weren’t afraid to stick up for themselves by any means necessary. One day, it appeared that they had pushed too far, and the Wolf had finally had enough. He walked up to each one of his rebellious tenants, and left an eviction notice on each of their doors. Out of all three of the pigs, the second Little Pig was shocked the most, regretting everything he had done. “Oh no, what am I going to do now? The only other place I can rent would be the Candy House up by Drury Lane, and that costs $3000 a month! That’s 75% of my paycheck!” Panicking, he ran over to his brother’s apartment, only to find him in the same dilemma.
However, the first Little Pig reacted slightly differently, giving a more nonchalant attitude towards the whole thing. “Eh, who cares if he evicts us? How’s he gonna enforce it, with his big bad lungs? We’ve got nothing to worry about.” This apathetic tone would prove to get them very far, as it rapidly influenced the other tenants, one by one. However, the second Little Pig was still skeptical.
“This doesn’t seem like a very good idea, brother,” he said, with woe dominating his voice.
“I know it seems stupid,” uttered the first Pig, “but if we just try, I’m sure we can get the Wolf to knock it off!”
“A-alright, I guess I’ll just have to trust you.”
The second Little Pig scampered away to go tell his other sibling of the plan. He knocked on the third Little Pig’s door, urging him to let him in. As the third Little Pig reached for the door, his enthusiastic brother began to speak.
“Hey, so did you hear of the plan? We’re gonna continue living in our apartments even if we get eviction notices! He can’t evict all of us, now can he?”
The third Little Pig responded with an exhausted tone, “Dude, it’s 1:00 in the morning. Do you have to explain this to me now? And what is this about refusing an eviction? It sounds like a terrible idea. Do you know what the Wolf is capable of? He could push us out of our homes at any second, and replace us with tenants who are even more desperate for shelter and cooperative in his outrageous prices than we are!”
His reluctance made the second brother question his choices. Should they really test the power of their landlord, or should they continue living under their current conditions? The choice had to be made soon.
Later that day, the Wolf consulted many of his tenants, telling them that they were going to be evicted soon if they didn’t pay up. Soon enough, he got around to the three Little Pigs, the banes of his existence. He knocked on the first Pig’s door, but he found no response. He waited, and waited, and after a solid 25 minutes, he decided to simply put a sign on his door, stating his eviction. The second pig watched this unfold, knowing that his brother was executing his plan successfully. Despite this, he still had his doubts. He felt that he needed to wait and see what happened to his other brother in order to draw a conclusion of which decision was better. He decided to hide himself in his room to avoid the confrontation. He knew his second brother wouldn’t hide from the Wolf, and wasn’t scared to confront him at all.
The Wolf knocked before exclaiming, “Little Pig! Little Pig! Let me in! Let me in!” The third Pig opened the door, as the Wolf began to discuss moving him out. “Alright, look, you’ve been late on your payments for several months now, and I don’t know what else to do. I’m going to have to evict you.”
The second Pig was unsure of how his brother was going to respond, so he continued to listen. “Well, I’m not paying a dime until my place is repaired! It’s only fair that this apartment is functional, given that I have to pay $1200 a month!”
The Wolf retorted, with a snarky comment, “Oh yeah, like what? I try my hardest to manage this place, and all I ever get is tenants complaining that I’m charging too much. So tell me please, what’s wrong with this place?”
The third pig began to give a lengthy rant, “Well, for starters, there are multiple broken water pipes, so it’s nearly impossible to take a shower without water leaking everywhere. Also, the gas is extremely inconsistent, so I can rarely cook myself any nutritious food. But that’s not even the worst part. Take a look at this balcony. There aren’t any guard rails!”
The Wolf peered out onto the balcony, only to see that the final complaint from the Pig wasn’t true at all, but by the time he had noticed, it was already too late. The third Little Pig pushed the Big Bad Wolf off the edge of his balcony, causing him to plummet into the concrete abyss. Immediately, the other tenants locked up all the doors, making sure he wouldn’t be able to come back in. The third Little Pig looked down at the Wolf, thinking, “How does it feel for YOU to be kicked out?” He walked back inside, knowing that his $1200 a month would go towards better things.